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Beating the Stay-at-Home Blues  
by Cheryl Gochnauer, Homebodies.org

According to recent government statistics, nearly 75 percent of married mothers with children under 18 work.  That means working women who become stay-at-home moms have to be proactive to avoid feeling isolated.

"The biggest problem I had in my first year home as a stay-at-home mom was the loneliness," writes Charlotte.  "I had no connection to any other stay-at-home moms because I had been in the work-for-pay force for two decades.

"It was a rough year, but I slowly found my network and have been firmly attached ever since."

Found my network.  That's the key phrase in Charlotte's letter.  She discovered ways to link up with other like-minded moms.

A prospective stay-at-home mother should start her search for support long before she leaves the workplace.  If she thinks ahead of time, "Okay, this is how I'm going to carve out some time to spend with friends" or "I'm going check out local moms groups before I quit work, and start building some relationships," her chances of becoming isolated lessen.

If you're already at home and feeling cut-off from adult interaction, it's time to stop moping and start MOP-ping.

MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) is an international parenting organization that hosts over 80,000 women in 2,000 groups around the world.  Guest speakers provide child-rearing hints, as members explore areas of creativity and express their thoughts and frustrations freely in discussion groups.  To find the group nearest to you, go to www.MOPS.org, check with local churches, or call MOPS at (303)733-5353.

Mothers & More sponsors bi-weekly meetings and activities sure to "get your brain cells back in gear."  Modest membership dues entitle moms to a monthly newsletter and attendance at local meetings.  Mothers & More's babysitting co-ops, advocacy programs and membership directories strengthen ties between at-home moms.  Check out their website at www.mothersandmore.org, or call 630-941-3553.

The goal of Mothers at Home (MAH) is to "provide support and encouragement to today's at-home mothers, correct society's misconceptions and refute stereotypes about at-home mothers." They publish a monthly magazine called "Welcome Home."  For more info, call (800) 783-4666, or visit their website at www.mah.org.

At-home moms living in remote areas without parenting support groups such as these should consider getting a computer with unlimited Internet access. The Worldwide Web is full of parenting chatrooms and message boards where you can share successes and vent frustrations. Be sure to check out my own site, www.homebodies.org.

Don't be shy about approaching other stay-at-home moms individually, or starting up your own support group with friends, either.  As Charlotte notes, "I've tried to extend my hand to others who are not as far along in (the at-home lifestyle) as I am.  I am very grateful to all my mentors, and this is the only way to effectively give them their due."

To subscribe to Cheryl's free weekly Homebodies e-zine, write subscribe-ds-homebodies@ds.xc.org or visit her website at www.homebodies.org.  copyright 2003 Cheryl Gochnauer - All rights reserved.

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