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This Mother's Place  
by Cheryl Gochnauer, Homebodies.org

It's not easy holding down two demanding jobs, one outside and one inside the home. So when my daughters were 6 and 2, I turned in my resignation and became a stay-at-home mom.

I was 36, a nearly-20 year veteran of office politics and project deadlines. This was merely a time-out, a season of my life when I would focus on family instead of faxes. As soon as my baby hit first-grade, I'd head back for my cubicle.

That was the plan, anyway. But the more time I spent with my girls, the more they depended on me. And as our once-elusive quality time together expanded, I realized I needed them, too.

I suppose some may view scaling back material possessions as sacrifice. But I know I've made a good trade when I'm on hand for those teachable moments in my children's lives. And surprisingly, they didn't halt when my youngest started school. In many ways, those opportunities have increased as my girls have grown.

Recently, my preteen burst off the bus and in the front door, her face a thundercloud of anger and barely contained tears.

Wiping my hands on a dishcloth, I stepped into the living room from the kitchen, where I was starting dinner. "What happened?" I asked.

"Nothing." Didn't look like nothing.

Guiding her over to the couch, we sat down. With my hand on her shoulder, I asked again. "What happened?" Then the cloud burst, and the story of her disintegrating relationship with another girl poured out.

I'm so glad I was there! It was about 4:00 p.m. In my old life, I wouldn't have even been home until 6:30 p.m. By then, my daughter would have plowed her feelings under. The chance to bond would have been lost.

What was I making for dinner that night? I don't have a clue. But the moments spent helping heal my child's hurt are forever seared in my heart.

This time at home has turned out to be a gift to me, as well as to my children. That's because we've found the balance that fits our unique family. Since we are all individuals, it would be unfair to cookie-cut every mother into being a full-time stay-at-home mom. But being home certainly has turned out to be the perfect place for me.

It has been a while since my youngest entered first grade. My projected target date for returning to the office has come and gone. But that's okay. I'm happy on this path. For me, the Promised Land lies in my own backyard.

Comments?  E-mail Cheryl@homebodies.org, or visit her website at www.homebodies.org.  Her book, "So You Want to Be a Stay-at-Home Mom," is available at The Light Keeper's Bookstore..  

copyright 2003 Cheryl Gochnauer and Homebodies.org, LLC - All rights reserved.

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