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A Life Lesson for this WAHM
by Barb Niehaus, The ParentPrenuer Club

There are times in our lives that a person, an event, or a place are etched indelibly in our memory. These "Kodak moments" as I refer to them, are usually the result of a momentous occasion, such as a child's birth, a marriage proposal or some other grand happening. In my case, one of my most vivid and humbling memories took course in a matter of a minute by my six year old daughter. It's amazing how a few words can leave such an impact on a person.

As a WAHM of twelve years, my salary for many of those years was based upon the amount of work generated on a daily basis. The more projects I completed, the heftier my pay. My work week would consist of churning out work 7 days a week and logging in 40-50 hours on average.

When my children were small and their day consisted of naps and early bedtimes it was fairly easy to put in my self-required hours. I just worked my schedule around theirs and was able to maintain quality time with them during their waking hours.

As they grew and their demands followed suit, I would hire a sitter for them a couple days a week in addition to them attending preschool. I consistently filled my quotas of projects, generated a comfortable income but my "quality" time was gradually decreasing. There were just not enough hours in the day any longer and something had to be sacrificed; unfortunately, it was my children. I justified the time spent away from them huddled over my desk by telling myself that my salary was buying them the "extras" that all kids wanted.

One day I turned from my desk to see my middle daughter, who was six at the time, standing hesitantly in my office doorway. The expression on her face was one of "Why bother?" I coaxed her request from her and here's what she had to say: "I know you're always working, Mom, but if you ever can take a day off, could we maybe...?" The hurt and guilt I felt couldn't have been any more painful had she stuck a stiletto in my back. And as they say, "Out of the mouths of babes."

That particular "Kodak moment", though not pleasant, was one of the hardest but most valuable life's lessons that I ever experienced. I made a vow that day to reexamine and adjust my priorities.

My schedule now consists of many 4:30 a.m. sessions at my desk to get several hours of work completed before my kids get up. I literally burn the midnight oil to be available in the summer daytime hours to "hang out". I no longer hire sitters - I am the caregiver.

It's so easy to get caught up in a home-based job or business. We all have the need to be successful and prove ourselves as more than just being a "mom". But let's never forget why we chose to be WAHM's... to be a hands-on parent and to be there when our kids needed us.

Barb Niehaus of Cincinnati, Ohio, created Moms @ Home Working, http://www.moms-home-work.com, to assist women who are looking for "the perfect balance between work and family" -- being a WAHM.

To subscribe to the free daily ezine of Moms @ Home Working, packed with at-home jobs, business tips, freebies and more, send a blank email: subscribe@moms-home-work.com

Copyright 2000 Barb Niehaus - All rights reserved.

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